Isaiah 62

Because I love Zion,
I will not keep still.
Because my heart yearns for Jerusalem,
I cannot remain silent.
I will not stop praying for her
until her rightousness shines like the dawn,
and her salvation blazes like a burning torch.
The nations will see your rightousness.
World leaders will be blinded by your glory.
And you will be given a new name,
by the Lord's own mouth.
The Lord will hold you in his hand for all to see--
a splendid crown in the hand of God.
Never again will you be called "The Forsaken City,"
or "The Desolate Land."
Your new name will be "The City of God's Delight,"
and "The Bride of God,"
for the Lord delights in you
and will claim you as his bride,
Your children will commit themselves to you, O Jerusalem,
just as a young man commits himself to his bride.
Then God will rejoice over you
as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride.

O Jerusalem, I have posted watchmen on your walls;
they will pray day and night, continually.
Take no rest, all you who pray to the Lord.
Give the Lord no rest until he completes his work,
until he makes Jerusalem the pride of the earth.
The Lord has sworn to Jerusalem by his own strength:
"I will never again hand you over to your enemies.
Never again will foreign warriors come
and take away your grain and new wine.
You raised the grain, and you will eat it,
praising the Lord.
Within the courtyards of the Temple,
you yourselves will drink the wine you have pressed."

Go out through the gates!
Prepare the highway for my people to return!
Smooth out the road, pull out the boulders;
raise a flag for all the nations to see.
The Lord has sent this message to every land:
"Tell the people of Israel,
'Look, your savior is coming.
See, he brings his reward with him as he comes.'"
They will be called "The Holy People"
and "The People Redeemed by the Lord."
And Jerusalem will be known as "The Desirable Place"
and "The City No Longer Forsaken."

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Now, read through this again. Replace "Zion" and "Jerusalem" with your name. Replace it with the name of your church. The name of your school. The name of your city.

For Georgia's sake, I will not keep still.

Because my heart yearns for Fellowship of Christians, I cannot remain silent.

I will not stop praying for Arkansas Tech University until her rightousness shines like the dawn.

Russellville will be given a new name.

Never again will Tech Fellowship be called "The Forsaken City" or "The Desolate Land."

Tech Fellowship's new name will be "The City of God's Delight," and "The Bride of God."

Because I love Tech Fellowship, I will not keep still.

You walk with me through fire.

Day 27

This afternoon, I'm sitting at the desk of my room at my house in England staring out the window and watching flakes of snow dance across the sky (let's see how many prepositions can fit into sentence, shall we?).

The view from my window is an ugly one: crooked telephone poles in the alley frame the remnants of my neighbor's house that burned to the ground several months ago, surrounded by a backdrop of a neighborhood that signifies the beginning of the town ghetto.

It's nice to know that outside intervention can bring beauty to even the most desolate and ragged eyesores.

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Today is the 27th day of my winter break. Until about a week ago, I was counting these days like tally marks carved into the wall of a prison cell (I was not literally counting the days. I do not voluntarily incorporate math into my everyday life). Today, I am surprised to find that, if weather and road conditions permit, I will be traveling back to Arkansas Tech in less than two days.

It took some time to realize that the prison of which I speak is not the house that-- save a few trips to Little Rock and Russellville--I have been trapped inside due to its distance from my friends and the economy's intimidating gas prices. Suffocating as this town is, I found that the box in which I was trapped was the prison of myself. My thoughts, my emotions, and my physical being were all screaming because they were sick of Georgia.

These feelings are nothing new. I've had them before. All humans long to escape from the concept of Self. Fortunately, I know how to rid these feelings. I know that Christ died to save me from Self, to free me from Georgia. I know how to let go of Self, how lay Self at the feet of Christ, and how to live for Him so that I don't even have to deal with Self. But I also knew that taking my burdens to Christ would require examining them. Letting go of the things that were destroying me would mean giving them up. I knew that ignoring problems doesn't make them go away. So I tried dwelling on them instead.

Foolish girl.

A few weeks ago I drove up to my church in Russellville. I needed to worship and listen and talk and hug and receive hugs and simply escape for a while. After the service, a middle-aged couple who are very near to my heart (as well as the “correction is not rejection” kind of mentors I need) asked,

“How are you doing? Have you been feeling any better?”

“Was I not feeling well?” I attempted to fake confusion with a fake smile.

“Stop trying to hide, George. We see right through it. You’ve got to let this stuff go. You haven’t been yourself for too long. Where’s the spunky joyful girl we met a few months ago? This isn’t the real you.”


And then it hit me.


“Actually, that’s the problem. This is the real me. The flesh me, Georgia-minus-Jesus. You’re right…I’ve got to let it go…like, for real let it go. I’ve got STOP being myself.”


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Sometime and somewhere in the past two weeks, I’ve found healing. It’s come through a series of midnight interstate drives, kitchen-table coffee dates with David and the Psalms, time spent swapping between Donald Miller and Leslie Ludy books (because I can only handle so much of each of them in one sitting), laughter with friends, morning bike rides with Lecrae, tears in the shower, reflections on past seasons of my life, and a person who knew nothing of my situation yet seemed to know everything about my situation whose simple words led me right back to the feet of my True Love, where I was able to understand Christ’s longing for me more clearly than ever before. Ultimately, healing has come through submission of time, thoughts, emotions, plans, and life that was never really mine in the first place.


Restoration is a process, and it isn’t as easy as I hoped it would be. But in healing, there is change. Change for the better than turns wounds into scars that tell stories. Change that brings about growth and difference and strength and new layers. Change that takes the old and trades it in for something new.


Change that brings beauty to even the most desolate and ragged eyesores.

You say goodbye, I say hello

When the world appears motionless, solemn, and frozen,

do not lose heart;

for it is in the Winter that I prepare for Spring.

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In my lifetime, 2010 was without a doubt the single greatest year of transition, change, challenge, and growth.

For every adventure, experience, friendship, blessing, heartache, healing, and test of faith, I am ever grateful.

God moves from glory to glory, and my 21 years of life have proved this to be true. That being said, I hold great expectations for the year 2011.

I won't be satisfied with anything ordinary...I won't be satisfied at all.