Coming Soon

It's been over four months since my last post.

I have no excuse for my lack of blog dedication; I have had plenty of time to write this summer, so naturally, I haven't written a thing.

But fear not, four people who read this blog! I plan to update several times in the next few weeks. I have a lot to write about, and I will have nothing else better to on Thursay and Friday when I have PAID TIME OFF, as well as this weekend when I visit Hannibal, MO with my sister (yes, the boyhood home of Mark Twain and inspiration for the fictional town of St. Petersburg).

Also, tonight I took a big step. I made this blog visible to a select but significantly larger-than-before group of people on my facebook. I doubt that many of them will read it, but lately I've felt the desire and need to write for more than myself. Maybe someone else will come across and be encouraged or get a good laugh for the day.

I better get some sleep: tomorrow is my last "normal" day at Garmin, and my customers depend on me to listen to them yell and help them learn to use their computers.

Hello, Employment!

It's ironic that I, the directionally-challenged, will be spending my summer working for Garmin. I was recently hired for a summer/seasonal Product Support position at the headquarters in Olathe, Kansas, and I am stoked! This job was totally a God thing, as if He brought it right to me. Praise the Lord for open doors!

I start training a week from tomorrow. Eeek! This will be my first ever "big girl" job. I'm kind of nervous about that. But even more so, I'm excited about it.

(Just don't tell them I'll be making my way to work via TomTom. Shhhhh.)

Spring

Winter is over, and Spring is here...
both in the natural world, and in my heart.

Praise be to God,
who makes all things new.

braving memories

Dumbledore: "I use the Pensieve. One simply siphons the excess thoughts from one's mind, pours them into the basin, and examines them at one's leisure. It becomes easier to spot patterns and links, you understand, when they are in this form."

Harry: "You mean... that stuff's your thoughts?"

Dumbledore: "Certainly."

* * * * *

Music is my Pensieve. There's something wonderful about music's ability to capture and preserve memories and emotions. Take seasons, for example. There are certain songs and certain albums that I only listen to during specific seasons of the year. During the rare out-of-season occasions I listen to these songs, I am taken back to the "season" they represent.

Music preserves seasons of life, as well. I love this about music--it's like a time machine. However, sometimes remembering a season can be painful.

* * * * *




Meet Alexi Murdoch: Scottish folk singer and pure bliss to the ears and soul. I love Alexi Murdoch, and his album "Time Without Consequence" is one of my favorite albums of all time. It is soothing and peaceful, yet still complex and brilliant. Additonally, Alexi is one of the few folk singers I know of who writes positive music. Seriously, if the man isn't already taken, I want to marry him.

This album, however, is a pensieve. This album contains the memories of a very lovely season of my life, as well as the memories of a very difficult season of my life; both of which are very painful for me to think about. The memories stored in these songs are memories that I avoid, times in my life that I don't often allow myself to even think about.

In the past few months, I have briskly swept through the "As" of my iPod, ignoring Alexi Murdoch as if he were an ex-boyfriend I didn't want to make eye contact with. I have missed his sweet melodies. I have longed to listen to them. I thought about it a few times, but I never brought myself to actually tap the song and let it play. I kept telling myself, "maybe tomorrow. Soon, one of these days. But not yet. You aren't ready yet."

I don't know what possessed me to do it. I wasn't in a nostalgic mood. I wasn't feel sad or overwhelmingly strong. I wasn't setting out to prove anything. But tonight, I came in from Age to Age, pulled up my iTunes, and did it.

I pushed play.
And I've almost made it through the whole album.

spring cleaning

out with the old, in with the new.
let go of the past. embrace the present.


i think this is what they call "moving on."

Homemaking

You don't fully realize the importance of a home until you go so long without one. When I say "home," I don't necessarily mean the place you grew up, or the place your parents live. I mean a home, as in anyone's home. Not anyone's house...but someone's home.

Let me clarify what a home is. A home is a place you can relax. A home is cozy and welcoming. It smells good--like candles or laundry or a freshly cooked meal, or all of the above. It it comfortable--never too hot, never too cold. Homes can host parties and entertain large groups of people. Homes can also be intimate and one-on-one. Homes are places of escape. Places where you can cook and nap and chill out and pray and be alone but never be lonely. Homes are family embodied in a dwelling.

Let me clarify what a home is not. A home is not a dorm. At home is not a single room over which you sometimes have no temperature control. A home is not place that forbids open windows. A home is not a microwavable dinner heated in a microwave. A home is not "Feather Soft" toilet paper. A home is not jeans worn 7x due to lack of laundry quarters.

I don't hate dorm life at all. In fact, I've rather enjoyed it for the past 3 years, and I wouldn't take it back for anything. But this semester, I've longed so badly to live in a home--to make a home. Some nights I waste precious gas because my car is the only place I can truly be alone. A few weeks ago, I stayed the weekend at a friend's house. She fed me delicious wheat cereal in a beautiful blue bowl. It was delicious. The next time I went grocery shopping, I splurged and bought the cereal (my friend refers to any cereal that comes in a box as "fancy cereal." Most cereal in the price-range of college students only comes in bags, and is consisted primarily of sugar). I couldn't wait to eat it. When I ate it for dinner, however, it wasn't as good as it was at my friend's house. At first I checked to make sure I got the right kind of cereal. Then I realized what was wrong: I was eating out of a green plastic bowl. The next day, I bought a glass bowl.

All this to say, my dorm days are (finally) coming to an end. Yesterday I signed a lease on my first-ever apartment. A full-size bed. My own bedroom. My own space. A bathroom shared with only one other person. A kitchen where I can cook real food. A window I can open. A real sink I can wash dishes in (in fact, even a dishwasher! Whoa). A couch. Walls to decorate with real decorations (not posters and plain photos). I place where I can relax and unwind. I place where I can pray and cry and dance and be alone and be surrounded by others. And more importantly, a place where I can make a home to my friends in dorms who don't have a place to get away.

University Commons Apartment 109C, I can’t wait to spend my senior year with you.

preach, garfield